Sunday, 7 October 2012

Gran Canaria: XV

My flight arrived back in the UK at seven forty-five this morning. All went smoothly and I got home quickly.

The weather in County Down does not seem too bad at all.

Saturday, 6 October 2012

Law Repeal

My learned readers and friends,

Can the devolved assemblies of the United Kingdom legislate for the introduction of capital punishment?

If so, I should exhort the Northern Ireland Assembly to debate this measure instanter.

Capital Punishment

Timothy Belmont is of the firm opinion that whomsoever is found guilty of the murder of April Jones must face the ultimate penalty for such a heinous crime against a beautiful, innocent, little girl: Capital punishment.

Let there be a referendum of the British People.

Let the legislature of the United Kingdom repeal the law.

Gran Canaria: XIV

I had an informal meal at a bar-restaurant called Gio's last night. I fancied risotto again, so ordered the mushroom risotto with Porcini; and some garlic bread with Mozzarella cheese.

I had a similar meal several nights ago at Mamma Mia's, which was of a good standard, though ungenerous in its portion.

Gio's risotto was generous in size, though, with plenty of mushroom and parsley on the side. Its deficiency, however, was that it lacked the finesse ~ the viscosity, if that's the word ~ of Mamma Mia's.

I asked for the bill and it came to €22.50, which included the risotto, garlic bread and a soft drink.

I gave them a €50 note.

When the waiter brought me my change, he did indeed count it at the table. However, within seconds of his leaving, I realised that he had short-changed me by €10.

It was quite busy. I eventually beckoned him over and he went through the usual rigmarole of counting it out in front of me, seeing his error and correcting it.

In fairness, were one to give him the benefit of the doubt, it was a simple error; though one always suspects dishonesty.

I am of the opinion that if there is an opportunity for more profit, some unscrupulous folk might just take advantage; whether it be short-changing or over-charging.

Bear in mind that consumers can also be overcharged, in the form of adding an "extra" to a large bill, if they think they'll "get away with" it, especially for large parties.

In my case, I had a large bank-note and paid for a small amount; ergo, room for error.

Caveat Emptor!

The moral is: Be ever vigilant, Tourist.

Friday, 5 October 2012

Archiepiscopal Attire

A reliable ecclesiastical source has apprised my American cousins with the following details regarding the cope & mitre of the Lord Archbishop of Armagh:

"Armagh Cathedral possesses the fine cope and mitre that Archbishop Harper wore for The Queen's Maundy visit.  I am not aware that he ever wore them on other occasions!  He has now presented them to the cathedral and so they could be worn by the new Archbishop. The latter's ministry has been spent mainly in the Republic of Ireland, where mitres now commonly appear on bishop's heads as well as on their notepaper. This of course could either encourage him or deter him from wearing one in Armagh!  The previous Archbishop of Dublin, John Neill, habitually wore a mitre. On the other hand the present Archbishop of Dublin, Michael Jackson, does not. It would be fair to say that mitres are worn quite often in the Republic of Ireland and very rarely in Northern Ireland." 

Gran Canaria: XIII

A funny thing happened to me last night. Whose catchphrase was that? Max Bygraves? I had had a satisfactory meal at an Italian brasserie, Mamma Mia's, last night.

There was a karaoke bar across the square so, ever willing to exercise the old vocal chords, I paid them a visit.

I was perusing the song-book when a woman accosted me and enquired as to my name. She asked me if I was English.

This lady then proceeded to apprise me that her name was Audrey Hepburn and she hailed from Dundee. She was quite earnest. She asked me if a particular song featured in the book.

I had a look and indeed it was.

Subsequently she left me and returned to her partner outside.

Fifteen minutes later, Audrey came up to me again and asked if Pounds sterling were acceptable at the bar. Well, I informed Audrey that I had no idea; I paid in euros.

Later still, after I'd sung a song, Audrey offered me a drink. I politely declined, because I had enough liquor for the evening; though offered her a drink.

About half an hour later, Audrey passed me en route to the lavatory and practically ignored me. I was puzzled. Had she taken umbrage about something?

Back at my apartment I pondered this incident. Suddenly it dawned on me: Audrey believed I was the compere! I expect she might have been slightly embarrassed at this misunderstanding of hers.

Thursday, 4 October 2012

Cope & Mitre


I wondered if learned readers well versed in matters ecclesiastical could enlighten me as to whether the bishops of the Church of Ireland wear the episcopal cope and mitre at ceremonial services nowadays?

The archbishops of Armagh and Dublin do wear such attire occasionally.

Will the Most Rev Dr Richard Clarke wear the cope and mitre which Archbishop Harper wore? Or does each bishop have his own unique attire?

I should be glad to see the revival of such a tradition myself.